A recurring message in many circles of the spiritual theory world is that everything we do, every thought, every feeling, counts. This comes up with NDEs, past life regressions, energy healing, religion, psychic mediums, and so much more. That means not only is every bit of our mental and physical activity noticed and recorded permanently in our energy, but that we will be held accountable for each tiny way we choose to exist. In a way, thought-crime is a real thing.
I use this fact as a touch-point for myself every day, because I struggle with it constantly. I’ll admit to having a temper when pushed, and a stubborn instinct to crave justice. I have a really hard time seeing someone treat others cruelly, or just with complete carelessness, and not judge them for it. Even though I know we have no way of knowing what others are going through, or where they come from, some things just crawl up from the pit of my stomach with frustration and an inner flash of, “how could you DO that?” There’s plenty to get upset about on the world stage and political arena right now, but I have just as much trouble “letting go” of things like a co-worker who’s consistently late every single day with no consequence or obvious inkling of regret. How do you stop something from driving you to judgement? Where is the healing point within to quell the urge? I’m still figuring it out.
I’m currently reading Anatomy of the Spirit: The Seven Stages of Power and Healing by Caroline Myss, which is all about understanding how our energy bodies work, how our choices impact our health, and how some of the world’s major religions support these ideas. The author explains how our actions are recorded in our energy, and how this process is echoed in ideas like karma and the Christian cycle of sinning/confession/forgiveness. She calls us to learn about the organized, logical ways our choices directly impact our health through the chakras, how energy levels and signs of stress can be precursors to illness. For example, the decision to manipulate others can lead to exhaustion and physical pain, which can lead to serious illness or even death if steps are not taken to move instead toward healing. The more we understand the ways these consequences work, the more we’re able to heal ourselves and correct our behaviors for our own benefit. We can take responsibility for our own health and wellbeing in very real ways. The way we interact with the world can determine how well our bodies function. This is because our bodies are directly informed by the energy running through them.
But the part of all of this that sticks with me as something I wish others were more aware of, is how even the small choices we make—the private thoughts and rationalizing as we read the news, the fleeting encounters with strangers on our way to work, our bad habits, our indulgences when we think we’re alone, the ways we care for or neglect ourselves—help determine our spiritual health.
But not only that. We’re always being observed. Nothing we think, do, or feel is private. We’re part of the energy of creation, connected at a fundamental level to all living things in this world and beyond. Our vibrations shiver outward into the universe. We’re surrounded by guiding spirits and higher beings. They see all of this stuff. Every bit of it. Don’t kid yourself—if you pay attention to your gut feelings you’ll find signals telling you you’re never really alone.
Every embarrassing thing you’ve ever done—sexual fantasies and daydreams, the guy you flipped off in traffic when he cut you off, the harm you privately wished on someone who hurt you—it counted. It was noticed. It’s hard not to freeze up and tumble into fear when you really think about it. Listen to your regret. Feel your feelings and be guided by them, always. But also know that those who guide our Souls do so with the utmost compassion and purest, most unconditional love. They want us to succeed. They’re constantly trying to help us walk the best path so we can accomplish our mission in this life and fulfill our soul contract.
Sometimes I try to imagine that “aha” or “oh crap” moment after death when people realize that despite everything they’d believed, there IS more, that we DO go on, and there is nothing secret. That we don’t get a pass for any of it. There are no excuses, and when it’s all said and done we’re our own harshest critics.
That’s why I wish we all thought about this quirk of existence more often. I try to let it inform the way I go through my day, to stop me short when I have a flare of anger or annoyance. To not only have the instinct to think “I’m going to regret this later” before acting or getting lost in negative thought patterns, but to live with more compassion and kindness in all ways so there is no reason for regret at all.
We are all human. We can’t escape that. But maybe we can redefine what it means to be human. Maybe we can become people who are not only kinder to each other, but to ourselves—even when we think no one’s watching.
Love and blessings, friends.
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